I’m working on some longer things, but these are just random dumps for your consideration:

i/m in Blogland

• Blogs are kinda slow these days. Seems to be a sign of the times. I guess we’re all more concerned with paying for gas and heating our homes. Don’t worry, your crack Federal Government is on the case.
• Magician X continues to be the best writer with a currently active blog. He seems to have his hand in his pants a little too often for this old man, but I imagine he thinks I have my head up my ass too often for his taste. Obviously well educated and insightful. Frequently updated.
• Tim Ellis posts regularly and his blog is worth your consideration.
• MagicCentric must be spending his time trying to run down his lost kajonies after being neutered in the Haydn fiasco. I’m questioning whether he will ever come back. The last substantive post was on how to spell his name – and they say blogs are dull! His other blog – Atom something seems dead.
• I enjoy both Tom Frank’s blog and The Magic Whack, but neither offer an RSS feed, so I seldom see them. C’mon fellers – that’s just silly. Likewise Euan Bingham.
• Glenn Bishop tends to post in spurts, but it’s worth watching. He has some really good ideas.

I don’t understand Google

I’ve added Google AdWords to the site. Hey, if I can make a few pennies with little harm – that’s OK. AdWords supposedly reads the page and decides on what ads would be appropriate. On this page are ten articles. The Google spider persists in picking up on the couple of paragraphs regarding shoes for cross dressing men and putting ads for large size women’s shoes at the top.

One last Haydn comment

Whit Just Won’t Catch On

Unfortunately, I can’t exactly quote Hopalong Haydn here, because the Storm Troopers at Stalag Brooks deleted the entire thread about the 3 shell manuscript etc. etc. etc. etc………….

Somewhere in there Haydn AGAIN makes the mistake of saying he was reviled in the anonymous blogs for defending his friend Stephen F. Youell – he of the Bible citation email address – Sheesh!!! He must be a real holy man.

I don’t know why this is so damn difficult for him to absorb. He can perform unnatural acts with Youell 24/7 – buy billboards proclaiming how wonderful he is – name a star after him – whatever he wants. Please tell the world what a magnanimous, caring, misunderstood gentlemen he is. Feel free. I don’t give a fuck and neither does anybody else. That’s a fact. There’s actually real merit in defending a friend through thick and thin.

What is so damn irritating and unfair is Haydn virtually strutted around the Cafe, acting like some big time bad ass, knowing full well that anyone disagreeing with him would get sat on by Brooks’ ample ass. In short he was a bully. He deserves absolutely no quarter for any repurcussions arising from those actions. Absolutely none!

P.S. The article on the genesis of Whit’s name in the October Magic is worth a read.

Take care………

Drivel & Drool

Who are these people and why are they running my country?!

I guess I might as well admit it – I HATE GEORGE F. BUSH.

I’m a lifelong Republican – errrr, make that Conservative. Something G2 professes to be. Barry Goldwater must be twisting in his grave. In some respects I guess G2 is not particularly worse than many of his predecessors, but I expected more. In retrospect, that was naive. I had read his father’s lying lips as he was going to make provisions for our retirement and less reliance on Social Security – sound familiar? That lasted 1 year before he caved in and repealed the law. If you ever heard G1 talk about it, it wasn’t the fact that he broke a firm promise that bothered him, but that he made the promise in a way people remembered it.

Now I hear G2 tell us he never said imminent when talking about the Iraqi threat. That may well be true, but the clear thrust for going into Iraq was the present danger they represented. George!! Listen up!! The next time you want to play word games, make it about getting a blow job in the Oval Office and not bankrupting our country on a wild goose chase. Hell, they couldn’t even get one plane in the air. What a big time threat they were! And….. you have the balls to say you would not have changed a thing if you knew all of these facts. Maybe you are as dumb as some people portray you.

Now we’re asked to sacrifice due to the hurricanes and the energy issues. What about your fucking buddies in the oil industry! George, you’re nominally the President. You could do something!

Make no mistake – big corporations, the most corrupt institutions in the galaxy, own this administration and I fear they are striking the final blow to this formerly great country as we speak.

It is said by some, George, that you feel you are on a crusade. If that crusade was other than destroy this country, you have failed. Our future generations will pay for your malfeasance and sheer incompetence.

Nice legacy……..

Prepare for President Hillary!

I think I’m going to be ill – very ill.

This was in the Denny & Lee Newsletter yesterday. I think many of us know the answer and it’s ugly. For your consideration:

We just started our lecture schedule up again for the fall and I must say, I am very disappointed at the interest in lecturers. Below is a list of great lectures and it just seems that no one seems to care anymore. It is getting more and more difficult to get magicians away from their computers, plasma screens, DVD players, and instant magic downloads from unethical websites. Magic events are poorly attended, magic shops get no more visitors, and live lectures seem to be a thing of the past.

Below is the current schedule of lecturers coming up in the next three months. Our first one is coming up in three more days and currently we have only three people signed up for this Award Winner. This will most likely be your only chance to ever see him lecture. Oh well, the world is changing, and maybe I should learn to change also. I hope not.

Drivel & Drool

The Cafe’ continues to push the bar higher and higher when it comes to raw stupidity.

Bill Palmer started a thread regarding an eBay auction that he felt was misleading / overpriced. The thread is here. Personally, I think there are worse things on eBay, but that’s not the point.

The Cafe’ gestapo removed the link. What could possibly be the purpose? It seems they are personally out to disenfranchise one and all. Actually, I was surprised to see them step on one of the more visible names.

I’ll admit a prejudice against what magicians call illusions:

• Most guys dancing around, pointing, strutting and posing while someone else does the work just look ridiculous.
• Every performer that wants to add an illusion to his act so he can demand more money, seems to, invariably, go out and buy some rickety Super-X and proceeds to fool no one. The only audience interest is hoping the assistant doesn’t fall off as she sways back and forth like a Jack-In-The-Box.
• So often the acts look like they haven’t bothered to rehearse.
• I’m seldom fooled by the tricks, even though I’ve never studied illusions.

Recently I had the opportunity to attend a lecture by a 1st class illusionist and came away with a new appreciation for some of them:

• That stuff is heavy and hauling it around and setting up is a lot of work
• The magician doesn’t have to look like an escapee from The Pink Dildo
• Good props are very expensive, but the end product shows well. Very well.
• A good assistant is probably better trained than the magician. He exposed the Mismade Girl and the work that must be accomplished in a small space and in seconds is unbelievable.
• A good illusionists must spend a lot of time deciding what works for his act and not just buy a fancy colored box to prance around.

I could never be an illusionist. Actually, I could never afford it, but that aside, it’s just not me. I will, however, have a much greater appreciation for the performers the next time I see a good illusionist.

Drivel & Drool

I use Google as my home page. It’s fast, reliable and easily customizable.

One of the items I get is the “How To” Tip Of The Day. Some of the stuff is kinda helpful. Yesterday was a popular article on how to remove scratches from CDs. Be careful taking advice, as it is nothing more than a Wiki, which means any fool with a computer can offer advice.

Anyway, recently it had How To Perform The Balducci Levitation. The description was so-so, but I believe anyone could learn it from the description. You think magic isn’t popular? It’s had about 50,000 hits to date.

ehow.com is supported by Google ads. Basically, Google reads the page and then places appropriate ads on the right side. This ad on the Balducci page caught my eye:

Since the ads rotate with each access, you may or may not see this. Computer logic isn’t always perfect. Then again…….

Drivel & Drool

Another Report From Douche Bag Central……

Once again, an aristocratic, pompous ands unfair reply from the Cafe staffers (minor editing for readability):

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Honest question posed: I have a friend who wants to sign up to the Café. BUt he is using a free email from yahoo. He got a message stating that free emails are blocked on this forum.

Is there a reason for doing so? There are so many people using free emails such as yahoo or hotmail. WHy prevent them from entering the Café?

Another user chimes in: My youngest son wanted to join recently, as he is interested in magic. He was disheartened and I was shocked that he was not allowed in because he doesn’t have money to be able to afford an email account other than the free one.

Cafe developer with basic Cafe Fuck Off Answer: I can assure you there are very valid reasons for it, but I’m not going to explain them here.

Suffice to say if you ever run your own board of this size, you may eventually decide to do the very same thing, perhaps even for the very same reasons. Even if you didn’t, you’d clearly understand why it’s being done here.

Groveling user with every bone in his body wanting to suggest that developer perform unholy act with computer, but refrains due to Cafe policies: Gene, I don’t mean to be disrespectful, or even contrary, but I don’t think I’d ever block some one from coming on board on the basis of their being poor.

Case in point? My son.

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There’s no earthly reason for this approach except abuse. None. The answer wouldn’t have taken a minute. The real question here is does Brooks hire pompous, intolerable douche bags are does he train them in his own image?

If anyone reading this has this email problem, ask one of your computer savvy friends. It’s a very, very minor hurdle. There are hundreds of log ons available in the “underground”. Just hunt around.

Once again, we award the i/m Platinum Jackass to the Magic Cafe’ and its predicatable staff

Yesterday, the October Genii arrived. For those of us that have subscribed since the Bill Larsen days, the first instinct is to say “which year?”. Since Richard Kaufman has taken over, the publication schedule has been met with boring consistency. The magazine seems to be back on track, actually having magic in it, after going through a period when it had as much magic as the New Yorker. I look forward to its arrival every month.

Included in the poly bag was a demo DVD from L&L. Included on the DVD are over 20 performances from their DVD stable and two full explanations, Mike Close’s wonderful Dr. Strangetrick and the Larry Jennings’ self-worker Impossible. The choice of tricks to explain is excellent. I’ve always considered the Close version of Card Warp to be the best and Larry’s location trick is inexplicable.

The performances from prior DVDs, generally, are very good. A couple, like Flip’s rope trick, are painfully obvious to any but the most magically challenged.

In recent months I’ve begun to find the L&L DVDs tiresome on many fronts – the audience, the choice of performers and too little magic on too many DVDs. Also, they were advertising well in advance of actual shipment, with no indication that the product wasn’t actually ready.

The recent set, starring Joshua Jay, shows improvements in all of these areas. I hope it continues.

Drivel & Drool

The latest from Stalag Brooks

Sometimes I feel bad about beating up on the Cafe’, but then reality sets in and I know that what they do must be exposed.

Here’s a classic example, written by a long time user and genuinely helpful poster with close to 1,000 posts. You’ll never see it, as it was deleted within a couple of hours:

Isn’t that pathetic? Don’t let me hear any of that bull shit about it’s his site and he can do as he pleases. There’s right and there’s wrong and this is W-R-O-N-G.

I year or two ago, I bought Silver Shifter – Steve Brooks’ $50 rubber coin. I swear that’s what it is. It also came with some silver colored powder and a Q-Tip, I think.

If I rubbed the silver powder on the coin and I stood at one goal line of a football field and you stood at the other goal line it looks a little like a half dollar. Now I can perform miracles as long as you don’t move any closer.

I bought this well before I understood Steve Brooks. Those of us that have bought magic over the years have opened many packages and felt seriously screwed, but NOTHING ever compared to opening the Silver Shifter package and realizing you had just paid 50 bucks for a fucking rubber coin. FIFTY BUCKS! Supposedly, they had high manufacturing costs.

Brooks promised aftermarket books and even a special section on the Cafe for purchasers. I understand it will now be a section of Cogitations II. If the man had an ounce of compassion he would have, at least, included a bottle of Vaseline with every purchase. I’m still sore.

The next release from the fertile mind that is Steve Brooks was something called Free Fall. Someone gave me this over a year ago and I never bothered to break the seal. After all the initial hoopla and congratulatory posts you would think we could see it on every street corner. Hell, I thought they may even make a TV series from it. To date, I’ve never seen anyone do it or mention it.

MagicChris, took his lips off Brooks’ ass long enough to pen this:

That’s right! Anyone that uses Free Fall or Silver Shifter knows how his creative mind works!

Yes, Chris, I believe we do!

Having conquered the creative end of magic, Mein Brooks turns his considerable self to the craft of DVD production. He’s a talented S.O.B. His latest effort is The Rat Pack by Curtis Kam. Peter Studebaker reviewed it in the September Magic. I won’t fully recount the article. The final paragraph is sufficient:

If you build a better card trick the world will beat a path to your door. This ain’t it.

Maybe, just maybe, I’ve figured out the problem. Peter’s review says the performance was shot in a pool hall/restaurant. Talk about the fox in the hen house. How was Brooks supposed to concentrate when he was working surrounded by french fries and hamburgers? The DVD never had a prayer. Never!

I’m told Curtis is a nice guy and a good performer. Too bad he teamed with this clown for a very visible project. I doubt the Cafe publicity offset the harm from the amateur production.

OK! The title is trite – it’s Sunday and I’m tired and not particularly clever or original today.

Lost in all the hoopla over the Haydn/Sheets/Bush/MagiCentric/MagicWhack/MagicianX/Pinnard/Schneide/Kreskin/BabeRuth/HowieMandel…..etc. etc. uh……. controversy was the very real issue raised by MagiCentric in the original Haydn/Bush post. The lost point of the original post was there are 2 levels of accountability in magic when it comes to creation and crediting. First, there are the elite – I won’t call names here as that’s not the point – they can publish and produce anything and the magic world applauds. Statues are built in the park. The Magic Castle awards a fellowship and Steve Brooks gets so excited he nearly misses a meal.

Then there are piss ants like you and me. We can pull a rabbit out of a hat and some pious, self-righteous jackal will quickly inform us that that was developed by Reginald Scot and we should make arrangements with his estate before performing it again. It’s the ethical thing to do.

Create an original idea and have it ripped off and we hear coincidence or that it was already in some underground notes privately circulated by Hofzinser and the routine was well known among the cognoscenti.

Exaggerrated? Barely, if at all. It’s sick and perverted.

Drivel & Drool

Is it possible?

I’m about to say something I’ve never said before and doubt I will say again. I think the Magic Cafe may have done the right thing. OK I said it and it felt REAL strange.

The giantormous thread about the 3 shell DVD is G-O-N-E as far as I can tell. I hope someone captured it. Unfortunately, I’ve been away and didn’t have the opportunity.

My gut tells me that there’s something else going on here. Brooks’ boys seemed to have things well in hand last time I looked. MagicianX, always on top of things, wrote about Al Schneider’s posts in the thread. It may well be that the only face saving move Brooks could make was trashing the whole thread after Al called out some of that hypocritical cadre of idiots.

As I often said in my years at Arthur Andersen, “if you hear the truth, it is nothing but a statistical anomaly”. Likewise, if the Cafe does the right thing it is merely a cosmic accident that will shake the space/time continuum to its knees.